Another Holiday Slacker contribution at The Underside of Nursing.

Tardy & Sick Notes - Poems

Please excuse this little youth
The dentist had to check his tooth,
He's ready now to sit and listen
Now that his pearly whites do glisten.

* * * * * * *

Please excuse Clare
She had her teeth checked,
'Twas time for her yearly
Dental inspect,
The Dentist said bravo
They really look good,
You're obviously brushing
The way that you should,
Now head back to school
You fulfilled your mission,
You're a bona-fide graduate
Of successful dentition.

* * * * * * *

Jon said to his Momma
My throat is very sore,
And no matter what you say Ma
I'm not going out that door,
So you better call my teacher
To make sure that I'm excused,
If I went to school and talked all day
My throat would be abused,
And just think about my classmates
My teachers and my peers,
Dare I threaten them with sickness
And validate their fears,
No I couldn't stoop as low as that
I'd be the guilty fool,
Have mercy on me, Mother
And keep me home from school.

* * * * * * * *

Clare awakened Tuesday morning
And said Dad, I had a dream,
A horrific awful nightmare
That made me cry and scream,
I was living in a castle
And I fell into the moat,
A thousand hungry crocodiles
Had me by the throat,
Blood guts and gore I spilled
Into that sparkling water,
I must survive, I'm on a mission
As my father's oldest daughter,
Well at last I found the shore
And left that crimson pool,
But my throat is awful sore
So today, I'm missing school.

My heart was torn asunder
When I heard that gruesome tale,
It seemed so real, I saw the gouges
And her countenance was pale,
I reveled at her bravery
What a strong heroic lass,
And gave her my approval
It's OK to miss your class.

* * * * * * *

Clare woke up today
At five minutes to eight,
And said, "Oh, my goodness"
I'm going to be late,
Her dad said, "Now honey,
Don't worry and fret",
You've been late before
And they haven't kicked you out yet.

* * * * * * * *

So sorry
We're late
It happened again,
I was busy
While savin'
The women and men,
If they'd
Only behave
And stop all this sickness,
We'd arrive
At this school
With more punctual quickness.

* * * * * * * * *

Our Dad was late
He was out saving lives,
Of the brothers Karamazov
And the Stepford wives,
Well, they all survived
And are feeling great,
But I'm sorry to say
That the kids were late.

* * * * * * * * * *

Jon is sick
His nose doth run,
And he said, "Dad
This ain't no fun",
On top of that
My throat is sore,
Don't leave me now
There's so much more,
My bones do ache
My head is split,
So do you doubt
I feel like it,
Is better that I spend the day
At home in bed and far away,
From all my friends
Colleagues and teachers,
Call Jimmy Swaggart
And his preachers,
To generate
Some mighty power,
This just might be
My darkest hour,
In the darkest day
Of the darkest week,
How my throat is sore
I must cease to speak,
But come on, Dad
Please don't be cruel,
Won't you let me please
Stay home from school?

My heart was wrenched
Within my chest,
I knew he'd tried
His very best,
To send him out
I'd be the fool,
So I said, sure
Stay home from school.

* * * * * * * * *

This child is late
Please accept my apology,
What class did he miss
Was it math or geology,
His mother, she flew
On a plane, early morning,
A short weekend trip
With hardly a warning,
And this student stayed home
To care for young sister,
Yes, he sat on the baby
While waiting for the mister,
To return with the limo
Which today is their bus,
For this exemplary student
There's no reason to fuss,
So that's about it
The story's been told,
Please welcome him back
Into the academic fold.

Fibril_late;
 '87-'88