Working night-shift, some nurses depend on caffeine to help them through the night. One night there were complaints, regarding the making of coffee, and the possible absence of caffeine.

Coffee Rapture

It was a coffee calamity

Of epic proportion,

Where I promised caffeine

But gave a decaf distortion.

Humor was absent

And tempers were hot,

I felt there was a chance

That I might get shot,

With a bolus of potassium

In my right cheek,

Don't mess with a woman

On her PMS peak.

It was a caffeine debacle

I made a mistake,

It was steamy and hot

But the coffee was fake,

'Twasn't Starbucks or Peets

Or even Java City,

The abuse I was rendered

I can tell you, wasn't pretty.

My rep, to that point

Was looking pretty good,

I'd saved a few lives

In my new neighborhood,

But in 7 minutes time

It all went down the drain,

Believe me when I tell you

That Nurses know pain.

Well, I got on my knees

In the eye of my mind,

I pondered deep and hard

For a solution to my bind,

To vanquish my transgression,

In the eyes of my peers,

After all, I had planned

To work a few years.

I'd bribe them with food

And bargain days off,

I'd take all the patients

That spit, puke and cough,

The multi-organ failures

On week thirty-three,

If only they would forget about -

That night..................caffeine-free.

Some committee is reviewing

My position at this joint,

Wiser heads, than those I work with

Have a task-force to anoint,

So they can banter back and forth

Like a political machine,

Recommendations to our boss

A referendum for caffeine.

Policies and Procedures

Are like the Constitution,

When the word becomes law

It's time to stop the retribution,

And just forget the whole story

Behind my reputation capture,

Knowing some night very soon

We'll experience caffeine rapture.

Fibril_late

5/18/08