Surely, you recall that wonderful Christmas song, "Winter Wonderland" - maybe at least you remember the tune. Hmmm, hmm, etc. Ok, you're ready to sing along now with;

Sputum Wonderland

Sputum slugs, in his airway
Like a golfball on a fairway,
Curving to the right
Sputum out of sight,
Coughing in a sputum wonderland.

Sputum cups, on the table
Filled up full, tell a fable,
Chronologically a tale
That both his lungs will fail,
Grossed out here in sputum wonderland.

Sticky, gooey kleenex
In the bedclothes,
Crusty residue of snot
On his nose,
Leave the room and find
The snot on your hose,
Throw up in the bathroom, prn......

Beware of those, that have the wheezes
Hacking cough with power sneezes,
Sputum launches in the air
It's destined for your hair,
Loving it in sputum wonderland.

Fibril_late; 3/94