What We Do

What happened this week
You might not believe,
And if we weren't so good
Then someone would grieve.

Monday, we worked late
There were not enough rooms,
There was a late anesthesia
For the bride and the groom,
And sure, that sounds just like
My usual rant,
But Tuesday blew the leaves
Off the Mulberry plant.

Three Rapid Responses
Meaning, we ask for help,
77 year old Clifford
Was drowning in kelp,
Flash Pulmonary Edema
After a PCI,
We got him out of our Unit
'Cuz he was too young to die.

And then there was Willard
97 years later,
He got the leadless pacemaker
But needed a breath locator,
Because he didn't wake up
And he wouldn't keep breathing,
I tell you, this is more work
Than a one year old teething.

The final Rapid Response
Well, it was the best,
Billy Bob Borko
Was taking the test,
His get up and go walk
After Cardiac Cath,
To get ready for home
A short walk on the path.

Off to the restroom
He was looking good,
Didn't lock the door
Just like he should,
The toilet did flush
Then the ground did shake,
Billy Bob passed out
Man, I think he will ache.

Prone on the floor
And face-down, he was,
Not moving at all
I don't know, just because,
Till I called his name
To assess, signs of life,
Hoping to reassure
The whimpering wife.

And I have to admit
I'd rather not call Code Blue,
We don't need 20 helpers
In a bathroom built for two,
So, once again we paged
Our RRT pals,
Got Billy Bob moving
Just one guy and two gals.

All's well that ends well
'Tis the moral of this week,
Surround yourself with good nurses
No matter young or antique,
Because we'll pull you back
From the envelope of doom,
Keep you comfy in your bed
To see the sunrise in your room.