Epic Details

Folks get impatient when the procedure starts late, and also, when we delay their departure to home. The latter, is usually, because recovery did not go smoothly; in fact, we care about outcomes and safety.

Epic refusal
To grasp crucial details,
Your wailing in pain
Totally off the rails,
Flinging about
A threat of bleeding, for sure,
With 4 milligrams of morphine
We found us a cure.

But still, we asked why
What's the cause of all that pain,
Questions were posed
To the man with a brain,
So he ordered a STAT scan
Meaning, a bothersome trip,
Off to Radiology
That's a STAT reading, Skip!

Almost 4 hours later
No reading, on the scan,
Hell? What does STAT mean
Is your head in a can,
Then with three more calls
What say the diagnostic reading?
The guy had a small
Retroperitoneal bleeding!

How do you like them apples
Do they stick in your craw?
Doctor says, no go home
With a hem and a haw,
And the family says, Why
What's all of the fuss?
Well, you're bleeding inside
It's about you, not us.

Luckily, it stabilized
'Twas the thought at the end,
Joe Bob went home
Time to rest and mend,
But call 911
If your pain gets so bad,
If you pass out stone cold
You'll be a deadbeat Dad.

We haven't heard nuthin
Since Tuesday this week,
No shrieking sirens
About an aortic leak,
So we guess he's Ok
Ya, what was all that fuss?
Hope you had a good time
Thanks for riding our bus.