Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Luken's Trap

If you're a Nurse or an RT, you know about that simple device known as the "Lukens Trap". It is used in tandem with a suction mechanism, to retrieve specimens from the lungs, most commonly.

Over at Sister-central, in the Medical Office building, there is an auditorium called, Lukens Auditorium. Who knows? Maybe it's named after the same. But in my mind, I can only think of that auditorium, as being nicknamed, Lukens Trap. Thus, since I had to spend 8 hours there yesterday, taking in some somnolent-suggestive lecture, I penned the following observation:

Luken’s Trap

Luken’s Trap
Was filled with tired air,
The personnel who gathered
Had a collective vacant stare,
Nearly somnolent they were
Biorhythms in a trough,
When a momentary wakefulness
Was prompted by a cough.

Since I was being paid
I couldn't complain very loud,
Collective agreement
Was solicited from the crowd,
Call it preemptive education
For us EMR-users,
But even by lunch time
We were professional snoozers.

If the class was under 4 hours
With coffee and pastries and more,
Hooter waitresses and Chippendales
And bouncers at the door,
With pulse-pounding techno
Black lights and disco balls,
There'd be hundreds of employees
Cued up in the halls.

If there were reporters from News 10
Fox 40 and KCRA,
With up to the minute coverage
And the ongoing play-by-play,
The show would go on
With nary a nap,
And the facilitator lady
Wouldn't wake me with a slap!

I awoke with a startle
In Lukens saloon,
Surrounded by my colleagues
15 minutes before noon,
Where 57 bobble-heads
Prayed for a disaster,
Otherwise, there was little hope
To finish the class any faster.

Fibril_late;
8/25/08

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