Saturday, November 21, 2015

I'm Sorry

A lot of people are hard of hearing, or half deaf, or hear ringing all the time, which distorts their listening skills. So, it's no wonder there are misunderstandings now and then. When I have a conversation with someone, and the words seem garbled, or I just didn't hear them correctly, I don't ever offer this response; "I'm sorry?". Instead, I usually ask them to repeat what they said. I might just say: "Say, again?"

The thing is, when I am talking to someone, and suddenly they say, "I'm sorry?"............I don't know what in the heck they are apologizing for. I might stop right there and say to them, "What are you sorry about; did you do something wrong"?

Anyway, it's all just a misunderstanding.

She came into the room and said
It's time for your Cath,
I could have sworn she said
Time for my bath,
So I threw off my clothes
And waited in Limbo,
She flounced out of the room saying,
I'm your Nurse, not a bimbo.

I always blame it on
The ringing in my ears,
I did not hear you right
That's all it is, dears,
So, get off your high horse
And give me that bath,
Then I'll be squeaky clean
When it's time for my Cath.

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Listening Lunacy

I can't help it, I act a little crazy when I hear certain dialogues or manners of speech, that just don't make sense. Like those scripted things we are urged to say to patients and their families. "Would you like Fries with your Heart Cath, sir? Or that stupidest of concepts called "Active Listening". Anyway, I was at a class a couple weeks ago, and the Instructor ended almost every single teaching sentence with the adjoiner; "Does that make sense?" Holy frickin grammar monster! That lingo makes me want to run out of the room screaming..............ieqiestiaeint. Something unintelible like that anyway. So, once again, I have to address the issue in my own way.

She said it 29 times
Does that make sense?
I think she owes me recompense,
For ending each sentence
With that stupid refrain,
Does that make sense?
Is a toxin to my brain.

She said it 29 times
That doesn't make sense,
If I poison her tea
I have a good defense,
Because her repetitive uttering
That sentence ending query,
Does that make sense?
Not in Londonderry.

They might lock me up
And throw away the key,
It doesn't really matter
Or even bother me,
If I should never hear again
Does that make sense?
I'll be a happy man
Behind a prison fence.