Saturday, February 24, 2018

Bloody Mess (again)

Oh Nurse, never ever think that your work environment or work load could never be worse, because that is the equivalent of inviting hellish demons to prove otherwise!

Bloody Mess 

A colossal mess
In our complexity of care,
Vascular complications
That would give you a scare,
To make doctors throw tantrums
When they were the doers,
Poking hundred pound patients
With 14 French skewers.

Back in my days
At good old university,
There were Interns and Residents
To help buffer adversity,
Extra doctors on deck
When blood began to fly,
Now our current situation
Is enough to make one cry.

Don't imagine I'm blaming
Only the doctor,
Our corporate entity
Is a beast of a proctor,
Forcing tight budgets
Upon a short-handed nurses,
Thus, we bear the brunt
Of discontent and curses.

Few nurses are willing
To do what we do,
Ya, we get all the glory
The brave and the few,
But the conditions are abysmal
Unsafe, for Public Joe,
And when Boss counts only numbers
It's a pyroclastic flow.

A dense, destructive mass
Hot lava and gasses,
Exploding and gushing
And burning our asses,
Yes, that is how it feels
In Cardiac Support,
It never changes, my friend
And that's my report.

Saturday, February 03, 2018


Yesterday was cur-r-r-r-r-azy. Patient's behaving abnormally gruff, a couple major bleeding problems, cars breaking down, people waiting hours and hours for scheduled procedures and so on. Unfortunately, this is turning into a regular, daily occurrence. Even a couple doctors were short tempered, but amazingly, we actually had enough nurses for once. Sure, that probably won't happen again, but I guess it is notable.

Anyway, I managed to ruffle some feathers on a doting family member, and let me tell you why:

Brain Salad Speech

Near the end of 12 hours
And 40 million thoughts,
My words become garbled
And I begin to see dots,
Speech dyslexia
And sentence destruction,
Like a garbage disposal
Applying suction.

So, who could blame me?
A spousal wife,
When she misunderstood me
And pulled out a knife,
Figuratively speaking
Claiming, I was so rude,
When I asked her, "Now, what?"
I'm an insensitive dude!

"Now what can we do for you"
Had a couple words missing,
She immediately looked daggers
Sputtering and hissing,
I had no way out
Not even an apology,
It was her misunderstanding
And abnormal psychology.

For the next two hours
I avoided that room,
After she took the time to tell me
All dire and doom,
That folks where she works
Over at Hospital X,
Would have tossed me out the door
With a doubled-down Hex.

At 12 hours plus
I have a disability,
This ancient nurse brain
Has lost some agility,
Manufacturing speech
At the drop of a hat,
“Now what (do you need)”
Is not more than just that.


Thursday, February 01, 2018

In the Details

I am an avid student of the EKG and what is now called the science of Electrophysiology.


I spotted a parasystole
As obvious as a cyst,
No one else had heard of it
The reason it was missed,
Benign it was, in general
The anomoly fit the condition,
While I enjoyed the discovery
Everyone else had suspicion.

Effectually, they cared not
With glazed look in the eye,
A ho-hum sort of response
I felt that I might cry,
That's how it is sometimes
For the guy who holds the loot,
Getting excited about a mystery
And nobody gives a hoot.