Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Gourmet Thrombus

Do remember, when travelling in planes, trains or automobiles, to stop now and then for a simple walk. Wear support hose, and maybe even take a baby aspirin
(ask your Dr., of course).

Another big story
About a very large man,
How truck driver Bob
Just sits on his can,
Hundreds of hours
Week after week,
He eats far too much
He's an overweight freak.

A heavy tobacco user
He breathes his own second-hand smoke,
Driving the long haul
It's a wonder he doesn't choke,
With the windows rolled up
Like he's afraid of fresh air,
He has nicotine stained fingers
And tar in his hair.

Science has taught us
That long periods of sitting,
Are about as physically demanding
As a knitter at knitting,
In that sit down position
On an airline or a bus,
You have a high risk to develop
A Pulmonary embolus.

One thirty five kilos
Driver Bob, is pretty big.
He stops at the trucker diners
And eats like a pig,
These are not gourmet restaurants
They use the cheapest ingredients,
Lard, salt and sugar
Because it's expedient.

For sure, it satisfies cravings
Big men in 18-wheelers,
I'm not saying their work is easy
But these are heart attack dealers,
Stopping at Cafe' Cholesterol
Fill up their bellies, and refuel the truck,
And if they happen to get sick?
Just call it dumb luck.

Truck driver Bob, had pain
Man, he was aching,
In his legs and his loins
He was practically shaking,
Like that place on his flank
When he had that kidney stone,
But then he waited two weeks
Before he picked up the phone.

He went to Emergency
The man was in dire straits,
His thinking was all messed up
Couldn't remember any dates,
About what exactly happened
And when did it start,
All he knows, he kept on driving
He was in denial; not very smart.

The Cat scan did show
A massive venous clot,
From Inferior Vena Cava
To the Femoral shot,
His legs and his scrotum
Swelled up like balloons,
Plus, he was already built
Like a giant pontoon.

Did I mention that he weighs
One hundred thirty five K,
That's three hundred pounds
In the middle of the day,
About the size of three
Asian, new Grad nurses,
Who are mumbling
Into their iPhone's,
Obesity Curses.

TPA and Heparin drips
In bilateral Femoral lines,
Trying to dissolve big thrombus
Without infarcting his spine,
Absolute bed-rest
Be observant for emboli,
If they migrate to his lungs
Trucker Bob, could easily die.

That would be a memorable
Like doing chest compressions
On a Mini-Cooper car,
Rarely successful
Even in the ICU setting,
Odds makers in Jersey
Are already betting.

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