Monday, December 12, 2016


We have all heard about Betty Lou the nurse, who had a grand idea, created a sample, had peer review, found a manufacturer, got Angel Investor backing, and is now a bonafide gazillionaire, after selling their gadget to Google.

Me, I just get goofy ideas, give them funny names, and hopefully entertain a few hardworking others like myself.

Over the years I have discovered
Several new conditions,
But as a nurse, no one cares
They don't believe my renditions,
Big Pharma doesn't fund me
I get no University backing,
When I showed them my research
They sent me packing.

When the Internet came along
I figured, this is the place,
I can write up my theories
Without showing my face,
Someone might read it
And recognize my finding,
How brilliant my research is
Absolutely spellbinding.

Perhaps my new gadget
Will be the hottest next thing,
Then I can retire to Fiji
With my Pit Bull Mei-Ling.

- - - - - - - - - -
My "Copyrighted" Condition List:

1. Persistent Vegetative State (no, it's not Tennessee)
2. Circus Movement Brainwaves
3. Physician Index of Acceleration (PIA)
4. Ketchup Brain
5. Hypertension Deficit Disorder
6. Provocative Resting Test
7. Autonomic Reflection

Stay tuned for goofy gadgets like;
the Cardio Floppen Crappen, Sneezer Pleaser, and the,
Metered Dose Impaler.

1 comment:

Old FoolRN said...

How about the crapnograph which is the official recording a person on this better than Adkins diet submits to his weight loss coach. The patient meticulously weighs each and every bowel movement with a cleverly designed under the toilet seat scale. the patient then consumes only the amount of food weighing the same as the stool output.