Monday, April 28, 2008

I can't begin to explain this whole time-card thing, but I can take a stab at it with a rhyme [actually, it's becoming a series of poems -5]:

Time-Clock Wars

When I went back to work
The time-clock wars were raging,
What with Union regulations
And Administrative staging,
Petty minds and silly rules
Made professionals shake in their boots,
Sure to chase us into retirement
To make room for some ignorant recruits.

Dead Brain Waves

Part II; Time-Clock Wars

The old ones are dropping, like flies in the sun
They've worked here for years, and they're nearly all done
With the hemodynamics of pressure, dead brain waves and more,
While some obsessive-compulsive janitorial panel
Should be placed in strait-jackets constructed of flannel
Because this break-time snafu, is just one more, insane stupid chore.

(Chorus):
Snafu, is just another
Of my favorite acronyms,
Like, s-bar and fubar
And flams that are flims,
By combining these terms
We can describe where we are,
This time-clock snafu
Has become a fubar.


Two Fifteen's
Part III; Time-Clock Wars

Did you clock your 30 minutes
Did you take your two "fifteens",
Did you record it for posterity
Or just to earn your magic beans?

This time-clock we pay homage to
Is omnipotent, and called Ceridian,
It must be approached with deep devotion
At the 45th meridian,
Seven minutes before or after
On any quarterly divide,
Don't ask me to explain it
I'd much rather let it slide,
Because, here it comes around again
It's my golden opportunity,
If I don't swipe my badge correctly
I'll be punished without impunity.

Fibril_late; 4/9/08

Souffle' Surprise
Part IV; Time-Clock Wars

The soup has thickened
The griddle is hot,
This Ceridian concoction
Is thicker than snot,
New broth was added
For more flavor, less spice,
But the dishes on the table
All come with a price.

The chef is ticked off
The waitress is bloated,
They both missed their break
When the soufflé' exploded,
And when that egg hit the fan
Why, everyone ducked,
They collectively exclaimed -
We are totally mucked!

(Actually, my agent was there and heard something different... but that's another story!)
Fibril_late; 4/10/08

Us Dogs
Part V; Time-Clock Wars

Even when some dogs are sleeping
Others will remain awake,
We vigilant loyal watchdogs
Recognize what is at stake,
Our masters wish to control all our boundaries
Including leash laws and when we may rest,
How they revel in their control of our destiny
To us dogs, it's just another stupid test.

Fibril_late; 4/28/08

Exploited
Part VI; Time Clock Wars

Yes, I clocked my 30 minutes
Yes, I took my 2 "fifteens",
And someone marked it in a book
Though I don't know what it means,
It might be evaluated
By some expert panel folks,
In the meantime, I've exploited it
To rhyme these silly jokes.

Fibril_late;
5/4/08

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